I have been somewhat at a loss for words lately, which is why I have not been blogging. Every time I have thought of a possible topic, it has been quickly silenced by what has truly been raging about in my mind these days.
I have a fairly small, tightly knit circle of friends. One by one, I have been watching them struggle with big issues over the last three months--a year of unemployment for a five-person family, a miscarriage and three brushes with death (within a month), children with unexplained debilitating medical issues, inability to enter rehab due to finances, and one I am going to talk about in this blog.
I think I've known Vanessa and Adam for close to five years now. We met over our common interest in alternative diets, parenting styles, birth, etc. We bonded through our common faith and history of personal redemption. I was the doula at the birth of their third son, who is a mere 10 days younger than our Michael. I've watched Vanessa and Adam struggle through her frequent migraines, the rugged terrain of life with special needs children, and the ups and downs of his business. Throughout all, their faith comes out on top and you can see the grace of God well at work in their souls just through the hope they have.
Vanessa told me sometime in November that Adam had had some migraine headaches. She said he told her that he finally understood what her headaches had been like for the entirety of their marriage. When we crossed paths again, she revealed that the headaches were continuing to plague Adam, and they sounded awfully severe. She was going to research his symptoms. When she did, it pretty much looked like a case of viral meningitis. Not having health insurance for Adam--not only because of its cost, but because Adam is already a survivor of melanoma and has that as a pre-existing condition--they were very reluctant to incur the costs of a doctor. Vanessa did her research, and went gung-ho trying to help Adam get over his condition, but nothing was working.
The week before Christmas, Vanessa contacted their chiropractor, who told her to take him to a doctor to rule out Lyme meningitis, as the treatment protocol would be a bit different. Upon consultation with a doctor, before subjecting him to the tests necessary to diagnose Lyme, they figured they should do an MRI first. They were stunned at the results.
A tumor, apparently the size of a golf ball, was behind Adam's left ear. Surgery was scheduled for December 26 to remove the tumor, and we would know more then. So Adam went home from the hospital on medication to alleviate his symptoms, and he spent Christmas with his family. On December 26, my friends Kim and Laura joined me in sitting with Vanessa at the hospital as her husband underwent surgery on his brain. We knitted and crocheted, chatted, laughed, and then held her hand when she came to tell us that the tumor had actually been the size of a fist, and that the prognosis was not what they had been hoping for, but that we would know more when the biopsy results came back.
Adam bounced back unusually quickly, and went home 48 hours later, knowing it would be six days before they had any results. Meals were graciously provided for them every day for the next week, and they spent their time in prayer, family-time, and research about brain cancer treatment options.
I got the call on Tuesday, in the middle of the afternoon. Vanessa said that the tumor was not the stage 2 we had all hoped for, but was instead a stage 3, which we knew had a prognosis of 5 years. I could tell they were well-prepared for that possibility, and it was a relief to know that there is a doctor in Texas who has much success with these brain tumors, not with chemotherapy and radiation (all of the tumor had been removed from Adam's brain anyways), but with genetic treatments which activate the genes that will prevent a recurrence of the tumor, and with herbs which will stop any possible cancer cells from forming vascular connections with other cells. She mentioned a doctor in New York, also, but the one in Texas seems to be where they are being led. Where the usual allopathic treatments have not had much success in terms of this type of cancer, there has been great success with the genetic approach this doctor in Texas takes. We hope that if this doctor can turn an 18 month stage 4 prognosis into a 15 year survival with no recurrence, that he can help Adam live a full life and watch his boys become men.
First, I need you to pray for Adam and Vanessa, that they continue to move forward with the grace and peace of Christ in their hearts, embracing God's Holy Will while continuing to engage in the battle of their lives. Pray for their three young sons, aged 7, 5, and 2, whose existence is going to see some measure of upheaval. For the intention of the complete remission/eradication of this cancer, we are all praying to Blessed Pope John Paul II, who actually laid his hand in a blessing on Adam's head as a child when he was visiting London. Pope John Paul II's prayerful intercession was credited with the healing of at least two brain tumors during his lifetime! The Bible tells us that God hears the prayers of the righteous, and there are none more righteous than those who have entered Heaven, so we ask our brothers and sisters in Heaven to pray for Adam because we know their pleas to God will not go unheard.
Secondly, Vanessa's sister has started a fund for the McArthur family. She has asked that word of this fund spread far and wide, so that anybody who has a few dollars and a heart to help might be able to do so. Vanessa has always been meticulous about their diet, but now her efforts are doubled, and between efforts to buy organic as much as possible, plus investing in the necessary supplements and medications for Adam, trying to build a library with the information/resources necessary to keep Adam on the path to healing, and then facing the costs of trips to Texas and the physician's fees, well, it is a lot to bear on an already tight budget. They are going to need help, both now, and throughout this journey, but most especially now, when it is imperative to do as much as possible in this immediate post-surgery stage where his brain is free of the cancer which the surgeon has said will return. We are hoping and praying very hard to turn the question from when it will return, to IF it will return, but we need your help to do that.
I am hoping a website will be started soon with an option to donate there electronically, but as that is not available yet, I will share what I have and stress that time is of the essence. We live in a time when envelopes and stamps are a pain in the rear, especially for those whose children use stamps like stickers and raid their envelopes unknowingly for their games. I don't know anyone who fits that description...But a life depends on this now.
Here is a letter I sent out yesterday to many people from Vanessa's sister, Melissa:
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Hope everyone had a happy and healthy new year. unfortunately, as some of you may know, it hasn’t been a great start to the new year for my sister, Vanessa
and her husband, Adam. Vanessa’s post on facebook today says it all:
“I would like to take a moment to thank
all of you who are keeping us in your thoughts and prayers.
We received the results of the biopsy yesterday, and unfortunately they were not as
good as we had hoped. Adam has (had) a Grade 3 anaplastic oligoastrocytoma.
Apparently, it's quite rare, and quite malignant. We are looking at all sorts of options
right now, and would appreciate more prayers. We feel led to a clinic in Houston where
they have had a lot of success with brain tumors using an alternative treatment.
Unfortunately, the allopathic options don't look all that promising so we are looking
outside the box. Adam is feeling better than he has in years, and is very optimistic.
Usually I'm more positive, but today has been hard. I'm hoping tomorrow will be better :)”
I have agonized over a way to help my sister, her husband and their three little ones.
At such a sensitive juncture, I think all we can do, beyond prayer, is support THEM
and any decisions they make. So, I’m starting what I shall refer to as :
“The McArthur Family Fund” so their quest for Adam’s care, whatever they decide,
need not be sullied by financial worries. So, I’m asking you to PLEASE reach out
and to also ask ANYONE you may know who could contribute ANYTHING to reach out……
send to:
The McArthur Family Fund
C/O Melissa Franzen (checks made out to: Melissa Franzen)
35862 Camotop Ct
Round Hill VA 20141
Since time is of the essence….I am hopefully surprising them with this next week.
I know this is short notice, but tragically, the window of opportunity for any
treatment is mere weeks. I thank you in front
for caring, maybe if we all pull together, through the grace of God, Adam can sees his boys
become men.
PLEASE FORWARD ASAP TO ANY ONE WHO MAY HELP!!!!!!!
God Bless you, Melissa
Please address any inquiries to Melissa at:
mfranzen77@yahoo.com
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If anyone local would like to remain in the loop of those who will be providing as much support to the McArthurs as possible through prayer groups, fund raising, meal providing, child care, etc, then please email me at femmeanonyme77@gmail.com . We will compile and keep your information so that we know who to contact if some need comes up.
Thank you for your prayers. Thank you for your donations. Thank you for your efforts. Jesus is not going to knock on their door and say, "Adam and Vanessa, I am here for you." He is going to come to them through you and me, through the love, support, and help that pour in from all around. If it were you, you would want to know that you weren't as alone in this as you thought. If you cannot send funds, not even $5, send a card, send a spiritual bouquet (every flower in the bouquet is a prayer you have said for them--it isn't real flowers; you write down how you have prayed for them, what composes their spiritual bouquet). Every little bit counts.
May God's abundant blessings be upon us all, that by keeping at the forefront of our minds the things that truly matter, we may seek holiness in our everyday lives and thereby enter into the joy of this same God who is indwelling in our souls waiting to share His life with us.
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